Wednesday, 9 May 2012

Enter [ Part II ]

Have you ever been to a coffee joint or some cosy hang out place with really nice, comfy couches? You sit yourself down and your entire body simply sinks into it? The air con blows strongly while the sun remains unsparing out there, and you are enjoying your favourite food or beverage in the company of awesome friends? How at home you feel on this lazy afternoon. No stress, no rush, no work. Just chilling. Your tummy is satisfied and you begin to yawn. 

Garfield comes to mind. Just him, the couch, the tv and its remote control, lasagne, and the dog to add some amusement. We can roughly guess where the creator of Garfield got his idea from! And quite typically, if Jon were to ask Garfield to get up from the couch to run an errand, this is probably what he would say...
At times, we find ourselves in situations in which we do not wish to step in because we do not want to step out. A comfort zone that has become so warm and cosy. We feel so at home there. Why would we want to step out of it into something that is strange, uncertain and some times, threatening? Not until Garfield chooses to part from his ultimate comfortable position can he move from that spot to do anything else. Until he decides to willingly and completely give up his comfort, he will never be able to put his heart and soul into anything else. Isn't that why Garfield seems to always be dragging his feet around? He seems only enthusiastic about his food, couch and tv shows. 

Until I pluck my feet up from the spot I stand upon, how can these same feet occupy a new space? How can I enter into something when I cannot bring myself to be uprooted from what I am currently so securely embedded in? And if this continues, how can I ever move myself to be fully immersed in the wholehearted search for God's will in my life? And even if I should know this will of His, will I not face the same struggle as Garfield? I can... but I won't. Hidden under the mask of "I want to... but I can't"?

How can I then enter in when I cannot bear to exit? And even if I should manage to exit, will I not be dragging my feet along and thus, not put my whole being into anything I do, always looking back at what a better option I seemed to have given up, reminiscing the good old times? Will I achieve good results with such half-heartedness? What good, then, would any of my doing be if they were half-hearted? It might have been better to continue being on the couch than to be off it and adversely affect other people around. 

How can I exit so that I can enter wholeheartedly, without looking back? Without feeling that I'm settling for less? 
What am I refusing to exit from to enter into? 
Are there similar conflicts in your life too?

9 May 2012, Wednesday

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