I sat there by his bedside without him knowing I was there. I watched him as he slept, I watched the movements within me. The nurse came to draw his blood not knowing that the doctor had already done so earlier. They brought a new pack of glucose drip and connected it to the needle stuck in his hand, took a machine and scanned the code on his paper wristband. He had two wristbands with different codes - a bar code and a QR code. And all these while, I sat quietly at a corner, watching, pondering.
The future is unknown; not even the next minute or the next second is known. Not just his life but all our lives too. This is the fragility of life that Man forgets most conveniently as we scurry from one place to another, one appointment to another.
My eyes welled up as my heart enlarged. People say that a medical patient seem to be less dignified as they are subjected to this and that test, the topic of observation and discussion. But is it true? Even with tubes running everywhere, even labelled with alphabets and numerals written with marker pens on plastic bandages stuck onto one's hand, even when all the depth and richness of one's life experiences seem to be dismissed and one identity becomes encapsulated in just some superficial details encoded in some squarish black spots or lines of different thickness. Even so, here lies a human person still mysteriously remaining in the image and likeness of God. Here lies a person who is apparently God's beloved child.
But if this is God's beloved child, then it is even more perplexing. And I found myself turning to God, asking, "Where are You? Where are You in all these?" I searched for an answer in the silence rudely interrupted by the beeping rhythm of the machines. Can it be that somehow, amidst all these, God is still present and alive? That He has not left, not even for a moment? It must be. But where is He?
Then came a tiny voice, so gentle and firm, "Am I not here?" And I understood. "Am I not here?" in me to him, as I have come to lend a support, to extend the love of Christ, to pray, to care and love, to accompany. "Am I not here?" in me through whom God continues to affirm of His presence and care. "Am I not here?" also in him to me, as through him, I am challenged to care and love my brother in Christ, to open wider my heart and grow in compassion and faith. In the people who have chosen this line of work in the medical field to care and cure. In the facilities of this hospital that continually upgrades itself to give the best possible care and treatment.
But perhaps, what I had demanded from God was healing as I asked Him at the start, "Would You not do anything? You have the power. I don't. Would You not do something?" And so His presence through me to my friend feels inferior. How often do I dictate how I want God to manifest Godself in the harsh reality of everyday life so that life is made easier, more convenient, and faith becomes less farfetched?
Yet, God is still God and we are still creatures. Perhaps, God answered best my question of where He is in His invitation to surrender to this reality. The reality of my creaturehood in the light of His divinity. Can I, without fully comprehending His ways, without seeing His master plan, still believe without questioning that God's love never fails, even when what is before my eyes looks nothing like the 'love' I want, demand, hope for, pray for, and define it to be? That somehow, in my desire to surrender and live as a creature, discontinuing the pursuit to be the god-in-control, I may then receive the grace to let go and submit, and in this grace, to welcome the very presence of God Himself into my heart. That somehow, to find God, I need to first lose myself.
Wednesday, 19 March 2014
Wednesday, 12 March 2014
Seaweed, Rock and Morals
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How do you tell the difference between a rock and a seaweed? A rock and a seaweed have very different characteristics. And the rock is what it is even before humans gave it the name "rock". Same too for the seaweed, which existed on earth in the form that it is long before we started naming it "seaweed".
Our calling a rock "seaweed" does not change the substance of the rock into a seaweed. It remains as a rock, even as we call it "seaweed". Because this is the truth. When I hold a rock in one hand and a seaweed in the other, the truth remains that they are both different, distinct from each other. No one decided to fix this difference. It just is that way by nature. It is the truth.
Applying this to morality...
The Church does not set laws and impose them on the world. Rather, she fulfils her responsibility and duty to highlight, teach, explain and guide the world on what is morally right according to human reason.
That an act is morally right/wrong and it being easy/difficult to carry out are two separate issues. E.g. I may find it hard and perhaps even impossible to stop gossiping but this has nothing to do with and is a completely different thing altogether from the truth that gossiping is wrong for the consequences it brings and the effects it has on me as a person. A woman who was raped and is with child may find it difficult to keep the baby and cope with her emotions. And as compassionate beings, we can understand and empathise with her. But it is a separate thing from the moral truth that murder in abortion is wrong.
When we look at a situation that requires us to choose an action, we often allow the difficulty of the morally correct act to influence our perception of what is right and acceptable and what is not. So if something is very difficult to do, our hearts tend to pity the person or ourselves for having to do it anyway, like in this case of the raped victim. And then, even if the act is the right thing to do, like to keep the baby, we start to compromise, to say that maybe she can abort the baby so that she does not have to live with the trauma all her life. The more we compromise, the more diluted our conscience will become. But these two factors need to be seen apart.
To say that a baby should not be aborted in a case of rape is not the Church being unfeeling and rigid. The Church does not decide that murder is wrong. She does not have the authority to fix moral truths, nor to change moral truths. Murder is wrong with or without the Church, and it has been wrong even before the Church officially taught it to be wrong.
The Church upholds the moral truth that killing is wrong, and this truth cannot be changed no matter what form it takes, under what circumstances, regardless of the individual's moral inconsistencies. And it applies too to all other moral truths. What we can do is to offer all the support we have in our capacities to aid this victimised lady, be it in healing, prayers, counselling, befriending, financial assistance, etc etc...
And I'm so comforted and encouraged that Pope Francis gives us all a wonderful example. He shows us what being Church is, what community needs to do and be for one another - not to bend and twist, dilute or disregard moral truths to suit our circumstances and likings, and to make life easier and more convenient for us, but to extend the love of Christ to one another; to BE Christ to one another. That in the brokenness of our world and our lives, we remain with one another in truth, in solidarity.
Here's one example of Pope Francis giving Jesus to this broken world, one person at a time.
Praise and glory to God, from Whom all blessings flow.
Are there moral truths that you struggle with? Let us bring these to God in prayer, asking Him to shed His light of truth on these moral truths in our hearts.
Pope Francis Calls Rape Victim Alejandra Pereyra In Argentina To Offer Words Of Comfort
Posted: 08/29/2013 7:06 am EDT | Updated: 08/29/2013 3:38 pm EDT
Alejandra Pereyra was knitting at her home when she received a phone call from a stranger who knew her name. When she identified herself, he said, "It's Pope Francis."
Pereyra recounted the experience on Argentinean television, and after she picked up the phone, "I started crying. With an angelic voice, he told me to be calm and that he was calling because he had read my letter and my story struck him."
Pereyra wrote to Pope Francis in mid-August, recounting her tragic story. The mother of six said after months of police harassment, she was raped at gunpoint inside an officer's car.
The Pope called her at 3:50 local time on Sunday, August 25, and "when I heard the Pope's voice I felt like being touched by God," Pereyra said. Though her assailant has yet to be brought to justice, she said after her conversation with the Pope that, "He restored faith and peace in me and gave me strength to carry on fighting."
This isn't Pope Francis' first personal telephone call, and it appears to be far from his last, as Catholic News Service reported that he met today with the director of the Vatican telephone service.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/08/29/pope-francis-calls-rape-victim-alejandra-pereyra_n_3831500.html
Thursday, 6 March 2014
Prayer This Lent
My prayer this Lent:
Dear Jesus,
Reduce me to ashes, and then, bury me entirely in
You...
... now and forever.
Pope Francis on Lent (Ash Wed)
Pope Francis on Ash Wednesday: Lent reminds us that we are not God
2014-03-05
Pope Francis' first Ash Wednesday took place at the Roman Basilica of St. Anselmo. He began there a procession to the Basilica of St. Sabina, to symbolize the 40-day long "itinerary.”
He arrived just before 5PM, and celebrated Mass. He also received the ashes from Slovak Card. Jozef Tomko.
During his homily, the Pope explained how Christians should approach the Lenten season. He called for an honest "conversion of the heart,” and said that this "challenge” does not exclude anyone.
POPE FRANCIS
"We know that this world, ever more artificial, makes us live out in a culture of 'doing,' of the 'useful,' where, without realizing it, we exclude God from our horizon, and we exclude the horizon itself. Lent calls us to 'wake up,' to remind us that we are creatures, that we are simply not God.”
The Pope called out those who seek only power, and are willing to do anything to get it.
POPE FRANCIS
"When I see in everyday life some power struggles to take up space, I think: 'These people are playing God Creator.' They still haven't realized that they are not God.”
Pope Francis said that Lent is a moment to open up to others. And to do so, he added, there are three key words: prayer, fasting, and charity.
POPE FRANCIS
"All three share the need to not let appearances take over. Looks don't matter. The value of life does not depend on the approval of others, or on success, but of what we have inside.”
The cardinal members of the Roman Curia joined Pope Francis for Mass. Some may have even recalled that last year's Ash Wednesday was the last major ceremony for Benedict XVI as Pope. It took place in St. Peter's Basilica, just two days after he announced his resignation.
Tuesday, 4 March 2014
Capitalism - Part II
I've decided to put the whole post together in this Part II, hoping to give a better flow in the entry. It need not be read all at one go so I have included some questions for
thought at possible "rain shelters" on top of the already embedded questions.
(... continued from Capitalism - Part I)thought at possible "rain shelters" on top of the already embedded questions.
Most people adopt the utilitarian philosophy of deciding if something is morally good based on its consequences. But we do not just look at end results. What the process does to us affects us greatly too. Specifically here, capitalism shapes our desires in subtle ways we do not notice or recognise. We unsuspectingly adopt wrong desires...
Is the perpetuator really at the upper hand?
These wrong desires enslave us to things that not only do not bring us closer in union with God but actively pulls us further from desiring God and the things of God. We often look at what an act or non-act do to someone externally. So, the people who are marginalised, starving to death, sleeping on the streets are obvious consequences. We see it, we know it. But do we notice too what the same act or non-act does to the perpetuator?
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Yet, the person who forgives whether or not the forgiven appreciates it is the one at peace. It is the one who continues to care despite being misunderstood and backstabbed who is at peace, despite being hurt. Because that hurt will be filled in by God's love that flows into the person who empties himself out. It isn't enough to look at an act in itself but to search deeper for what it is doing to a person (the not-so-obvious).
The obvious about capitalism...
Having looked at the fact that what happens externally does affect our interiors, we can look more closely at capitalism. We know that capitalism has been the cause of exploitation. We hear of stories of children being paid low wages for hard labour, farmers who never seem to get out of their poverty cycle because the big players pit these poor farmers against one another to offer their products at the lowest price in the aim of winning the bid. Sometimes, they even go below their production cost. The poverty cycle never breaks.
The not-so-obvious...
But what does capitalism also do to the very people who thrive in it and are successful? How have they responded to God's invitation to love their neighbours? For companies to persist in burning up lands in Indonesia to clear it for the next crop generation, despite knowing fully well the consequences it has on the lives of people in their country and beyond like in Singapore, the damage it will cause to the ozone layer, contributing to the rise of global temperatures, ice caps melting, sea level rising, lost of animal habitats, destruction of costal homes... and yet they still do it because it is the cheapest and fastest way of clearing the land... ultimately, to save cost, increase profit margins.
To me, this burning is obviously bad because I suffer the consequences the haze causes to my health every year. The implications to the environment are obvious. Perhaps, these people continue to do this because they have not yet realised what it is doing to their own selves. What has capitalism done to them if not to taint and harden their hearts to the point of such indifference towards humanity? What about the people who continue to produce cigarettes even though they know it will definitely harm people's bodies, affect family life? What about those who build casinos even though they need no further evidence that addictions WILL happen and destroy family life? What about those who claim to be life-savers but are in the medical field because it pays well and puts them on a pedestal? Nothing bad it seems. They get the money and the prestige, feel good that they can save lives (though they are helpless in 'hopeless' cases), people get cured. No bad external consequences. A win-win situation. But what is happening within? What are all these doing to the image and likeness of God in these human persons who have only one goal in mind - profit?
Some reflections for consideration:
What are the beliefs the Church teaches that you find difficult to accept because you cannot understand what is so wrong about it? Take some time to reevaluate these beliefs, attitudes and actions to examine what could these do to a person, to you, interiorly.
Capitalism does not involve me... does it?
Special thanks to Fr. Chris, SJ for this video
an excerpt of David Foster Wallace's commencement speech
Kenyon College 2005
an excerpt of David Foster Wallace's commencement speech
Kenyon College 2005
Well, many of us aren't at the two ends of capitalism. We don't hold the market power and we aren't the farmers at the other end. We are the consumers who actually hold the power that keeps these big players in business, and the poor people in their poverty cycle. We stand in between these 2; we are their link. We don't really think too much about what we buy, why we are buying, who defines my needs, what defines my identity. Since we are not in the top management of the multinational companies, we are quite powerless and helpless. Not true at all. If we resist being manipulated by capitalism, who can these companies produce for? Maybe it is just you and I now against the tides but slowly, we build awareness, like what I am trying to do in this post. One person at a time. We start by evaluating our habits and desires, by bearing witness to the truth that we need not give in to capitalism. "Resistance is possible."
But again, we see no harm. Because the companies produce, I buy what I want, those poor people are given jobs in production lines, farmers are able to sell their produces to someone at least... everyone seems to somehow get by. More good than harm. Utilitarianism. Judging a situation based on its outcomes. As consumers, it isn't just about a simple act of buying. In that buying of what we do not actually need, we are allowing our desires to be reshaped and reshaped by capitalism. Because we don't think about capitalism often and deeply enough, it has seeped into our lives far more successfully than we are aware, bringing a destruction that we don't realise.
It seems to me that capitalism thrives on individualism and further emphasises it to make itself even more successful. The emphasis on the "I", making the "me" far more elevated and important that "me" really is. And it contradicts head-on with what John the Baptist said, "He must increase, I decrease."
Our focus shifts further and further away each time from the one true desire - God. Opens the doorway to overindulgence, greed, gluttony, lust to satisfy the senses. It becomes about my feeling good. "Happiness is understood as pleasure, the absence of pain." (J. S. Mill, Utilitarianism, C. 11, p. 257) Suffering is perceived as a curse, a punishment. I get angry with God who allows me to suffer. I lose faith in a God who leaves me in the lurch. In possessing and allowing possessions to define who we are, pride steps in, jealous of what others have that I do not have. Anger at my life situation, at an unfair God who gives more to some and less to me. And the list doesn't end here.
The question to ask is what is this seemingly harmless consumerism doing to my life's focus and goal? What are we doing to ourselves as we strive to accumulate more certificates, qualifications? What is the message that we are sending ourselves and reinforcing daily without our awareness, if not that God is not enough? God does not satisfy. Rather than placing my happiness and securities in God, it seems safer and more rewarding to have these tangible things. That being a child of God is not precious enough, not good enough to define who I am, not good enough a reason for me to walk with my head held up. Instead of claiming this sonship, I choose instead to constantly work hard to earn a reputation, sustain my image, a place in society, a status to claim what I am worth, to accumulate more so that my head can be held higher and higher, so that I don't need to hang my head low or feel intimidated and lesser when I meet someone else who has more than I have. What are we saying to ourselves when we give in to this apparently harmless capitalism?
Capitalism is bad.
It is not the final consequence that defines whether or not it is good. For the author of this book, Daniel M. Bell Jr., wrote, "In other words, the problem with capitalism is not simply that it may not work but that even if it does increase aggregate wealth, even if it made everyone on the planet a millionaire tomorrow, it is still wrong and to be opposed because of what it does to human desire and human sociality." Capitalism "actively works against the divine will for the renewal of communion with God and humanity." The author questions further, "With our economic lives ordered by capitalism, are we able to worship God truly? Are we able to desire God and the gifts of God as we ought?"
A means or an end?
The economic order, capitalism, as with all other things in life, must serve us in bringing us towards our life goal. We are not made to serve economy and capitalism. As Jesus taught us, the sabbath is made for Man, not Man made for the sabbath. The sabbath is meant to help us pause in our busyness to recall and give thanks to God for all the goodness He has showered upon us. Man took it literally that it is wrong to work and became anal about it. Wrong order of things. And so it is with the economy. We are not called to be slaves to economy, even if society says so. Our freedom need not be inhibited. Economy, its economic order - capitalism - must serve Man and take its proper place as a means, not an end. One cannot be the slaves of 2 masters. We cannot have more than one ends. We will love one and hate the other.
Some reflections for consideration:
Which master have you been serving?
Which master do you want?
The Ignatian tradition speaks about being in the world but not being of the world. We can be in the global capitalist society and yet not be shaped by it.
Sunday, 2 March 2014
Capitalism - Part I
Onto the next chapter of The Economy of Desire... in the light of my Moral Theology's first 3 lesson takeaways.
The Grinch who stole Christmas...
This is one of my most favourite movies I can watch over and over. The Grinch, a very different-looking human being, lives high up on a mountain cliff, away from the village after he was very hurt and wounded by rejection. Away from humanity, life seemed to get by pretty well. The cave he had shut himself in seemed pretty harmless since it kept out those nasty people who could hurt him again. Yet, not only did it keep him safe, it kept his heart locked in too. So much so that his heart was only a third the size of a normal person's heart. And he even invented a machine to scan his heart to keep its size in check.
One of the things that struck me about the Grinch is that he knew what to do to make his heart size shrink and to keep it small. It brings to awareness that what we do externally does have effects on what happens to us internally, even though we may not be as aware of these effects as the Grinch nor do we deliberately measure our heart-size and intentionally keep it small. Leads me to consider what capitalism does to us internally. Does it affect me?
Capitalism is quite good what...
The usual question people ask to decide if capitalism is morally good is: "Does capitalism work?" The answer is obvious - Yes! There are people who were poor and were made richer because of capitalism. Because of this, people conclude that capitalism is good for us.
This way of coming to a moral decision is called utilitarianism. Utilitarianism is to measure the consequences of a decision to decide if it's good or bad. If the good is greater than the bad consequences, then the decision is good to make. So, it seems that capitalism has brought about so many good consequences. Today, we have a wide variety of food to choose from, many gadgets to aid connectivity with one another. Hence, it is right?
Returning to basics...
"Instead of asking, Does capitalism work? we ought to ask, What work does it do? ... What are people for? ... Why are we here? What is our end purpose?" We need to trace back to our human nature. St. Augustine said that "our hearts are restless until they rest in God." St. Thomas Aquinas said "that our end is ... nothing less than friendship with God." St Ignatius said our life's purpose is to praise, reverence and serve God, and for the salvation of my soul (union with God). Does capitalism serve this end? Or does it pull us away from this end? Does capitalism bring us closer to God? Or has it made itself a god in our lives?
We are "created to desire God and live in communion with one another in God." This is our human makeup. Why are our hearts restless? Because our desires have been corrupted, disordered. Our priorities made upside down. Because capitalism "disciplines our desires" towards market ends; for the sake of the wellbeing of the market and the market players who are profit-driven. They tell us what are life's necessities. In Singapore, we are told we need certificates to prove our worth in society. This is how society works and we have to subscribe lest we fall out of the rat race and be left behind to fend for ourselves.
We are taught what success looks like and what failure is. Why does examinations cause so much anxieties in students? Isn't it because what is involved is not simply an examination grade that tells of how well we have understood the subject? The grades imply too how intelligent we are, how good our future prospects, how we will look in front of others. We are told to study hard or we'll become road sweepers. Yet if no one becomes road sweepers and garbage collectors, we'll be walking on decomposing trash everyday. It doesn't mean we all become sweepers and garbage collectors but isn't it true that because it has been ranked the lowest of all jobs, we have thrown it conveniently out of our minds, become unappreciative of the service these sweepers and collectors render to us, and even despise them who do these jobs? We need not do anything bad to them. We have already robbed them of their human dignity in our hearts when we see them as the lesser of our kind.
We study hard to gain the freedom of choosing the degree to go into. Yet, the degree we ultimately choose is controlled by what is in demand, what will give us the most job options and security, what will fetch us the highest pay, give us the highest prestige, but are we truly passionate about what we are studying? I can go into medicine with all its nobility and good salaries but I may not be passionate about it at all. I may well be dreaming everyday of becoming the compassionate Youth Coordinator in Church who can really touch the lives of the wayward youths. But it pays substantially less and so to give up being a doctor is illogical and foolish. We kill our passions to conform to what society defines as good, better, best, most often in monetary measurements. And we end up shaping our desires this way.
Perhaps, it is helpful to pause here to call to mind the beliefs we have about ourselves being in this society. What am I striving for everyday? What am I living for? What are my priorities? What do I spend the majority of my time working for? Who and what influenced and shaped those beliefs and practices?
(... to be continued)
The Grinch who stole Christmas...
This is one of my most favourite movies I can watch over and over. The Grinch, a very different-looking human being, lives high up on a mountain cliff, away from the village after he was very hurt and wounded by rejection. Away from humanity, life seemed to get by pretty well. The cave he had shut himself in seemed pretty harmless since it kept out those nasty people who could hurt him again. Yet, not only did it keep him safe, it kept his heart locked in too. So much so that his heart was only a third the size of a normal person's heart. And he even invented a machine to scan his heart to keep its size in check.
One of the things that struck me about the Grinch is that he knew what to do to make his heart size shrink and to keep it small. It brings to awareness that what we do externally does have effects on what happens to us internally, even though we may not be as aware of these effects as the Grinch nor do we deliberately measure our heart-size and intentionally keep it small. Leads me to consider what capitalism does to us internally. Does it affect me?
Capitalism is quite good what...
The usual question people ask to decide if capitalism is morally good is: "Does capitalism work?" The answer is obvious - Yes! There are people who were poor and were made richer because of capitalism. Because of this, people conclude that capitalism is good for us.
This way of coming to a moral decision is called utilitarianism. Utilitarianism is to measure the consequences of a decision to decide if it's good or bad. If the good is greater than the bad consequences, then the decision is good to make. So, it seems that capitalism has brought about so many good consequences. Today, we have a wide variety of food to choose from, many gadgets to aid connectivity with one another. Hence, it is right?
Returning to basics...
"Instead of asking, Does capitalism work? we ought to ask, What work does it do? ... What are people for? ... Why are we here? What is our end purpose?" We need to trace back to our human nature. St. Augustine said that "our hearts are restless until they rest in God." St. Thomas Aquinas said "that our end is ... nothing less than friendship with God." St Ignatius said our life's purpose is to praise, reverence and serve God, and for the salvation of my soul (union with God). Does capitalism serve this end? Or does it pull us away from this end? Does capitalism bring us closer to God? Or has it made itself a god in our lives?
We are "created to desire God and live in communion with one another in God." This is our human makeup. Why are our hearts restless? Because our desires have been corrupted, disordered. Our priorities made upside down. Because capitalism "disciplines our desires" towards market ends; for the sake of the wellbeing of the market and the market players who are profit-driven. They tell us what are life's necessities. In Singapore, we are told we need certificates to prove our worth in society. This is how society works and we have to subscribe lest we fall out of the rat race and be left behind to fend for ourselves.
On the hamster wheel...
We are taught what success looks like and what failure is. Why does examinations cause so much anxieties in students? Isn't it because what is involved is not simply an examination grade that tells of how well we have understood the subject? The grades imply too how intelligent we are, how good our future prospects, how we will look in front of others. We are told to study hard or we'll become road sweepers. Yet if no one becomes road sweepers and garbage collectors, we'll be walking on decomposing trash everyday. It doesn't mean we all become sweepers and garbage collectors but isn't it true that because it has been ranked the lowest of all jobs, we have thrown it conveniently out of our minds, become unappreciative of the service these sweepers and collectors render to us, and even despise them who do these jobs? We need not do anything bad to them. We have already robbed them of their human dignity in our hearts when we see them as the lesser of our kind.
We study hard to gain the freedom of choosing the degree to go into. Yet, the degree we ultimately choose is controlled by what is in demand, what will give us the most job options and security, what will fetch us the highest pay, give us the highest prestige, but are we truly passionate about what we are studying? I can go into medicine with all its nobility and good salaries but I may not be passionate about it at all. I may well be dreaming everyday of becoming the compassionate Youth Coordinator in Church who can really touch the lives of the wayward youths. But it pays substantially less and so to give up being a doctor is illogical and foolish. We kill our passions to conform to what society defines as good, better, best, most often in monetary measurements. And we end up shaping our desires this way.
Perhaps, it is helpful to pause here to call to mind the beliefs we have about ourselves being in this society. What am I striving for everyday? What am I living for? What are my priorities? What do I spend the majority of my time working for? Who and what influenced and shaped those beliefs and practices?
(... to be continued)
Sunday, 23 February 2014
Enslaved by Capitalism: The Economy of Desire (Daniel M. Bell Jr.)
Love this book: The Economy of Desire - Christianity and Capitalism in a Postmodern World by Daniel M. Bell Jr.
It articulates most precisely what bothers me about the society in which we live in... and against which I too am struggling.
"... Deleuze and Foucault (Philosophers) develop an account for how we could be enslaved to the capitalist market in a way that we actually want or desire that captivity, all the while calling it and claiming ourselves to be 'free'... (C)apitalism is an economy of desire... (that) disciplines desire for market ends."
Like it or not, we have all, to different extents, been shaped in our desires by capitalism. Just notice the women who feel the need to own a branded bag, at times, even if it means to sacrifice more than half their monthly salary. And how those without one because they cannot afford it feels somewhat incomplete. Notice the black markets, the imitations that sell so well. Notice how men would change their cars to a more prestigious one when the opportunity arises, not necessarily because their current cars have reached its 10 year mark or to minimise financial loss. Notice the increase in number of slimming centres in Singapore in the last decade. How many people do not own a smartphone these days?
I need to colour my hair because black is dull and boring. The different colour streaks make me look fresher and younger. Whoever determined that black is dull and boring? And even if it is, why do I need to change the original colour? There must be no life on my face, no sparkle in my eyes, no smile to brighten up my face that I need to rely on my hair colour to add 'life' to my expression. I need to wear high-heels because it adds a touch of professionalism and makes me look nicer, more confident. And whoever fixed this? Isn't my toes, heels, back, knees and blood circulation more important?
We are taught that life equates having this and that, looking slim and good, etc. We are taught, precisely by the people who are marketing these products, saying we need all these. Why are they marketing it? Because they are really essentials in life? Because we really need it? Isn't it for their own profit sake?
We have misunderstood freedom to be the breaking free from that voice within that says, "Actually, I don't need these." We want to break free from this voice that tells us 'no need'. We don't want to be dictated to do this and that, to not do this and that. But in actual fact, instead of becoming free, we are becoming slaves and puppets, manipulated, disciplined by advertisements to become obedient monkeys to do the stunts that would gain the audience's applause, to buy the things that these advertisements tell us would make us happy, satisfied, more confident and truly living. We are being dictated without even realising it. We are being controlled so that we will hand over our money to some other people.
True freedom is the total opposite. True freedom is to be without need, that our happiness is not controlled by another party or worse still, by dead, non-living material things. True freedom is to be uncontrolled by external factors, that in any given circumstance, at any time, I am able to choose what gives me life in its true sense.
The sad truth in Singapore is that even education has become, not entirely but increasingly, tainted by capitalism. If I were really profit-driven, I would set up a tuition centre or similar. It will fetch me a much higher income than I would get as a full-time teacher or even a private one-to-one tutor. How many who sit in the upper management levels of schools are not more concerned about keeping their rice bowls intact than truly imparting the right values to students?
But above all, I find the saddest message that all these are sending is that I don't matter, that I am not more important than your money, that I am not more precious than these goods and appearances. It just disfigures the face of a human person, lowers one's dignity. And each time we succumb to being disciplined in our desires by capitalism, we are reaffirming ourselves that we are unimportant. Instead of growing into the image of Christ, we are becoming subconsciously convinced that we are worthless. And this brings about a whole range of consequent behaviours to try to prove our worth in all the wrong ways... in a vicious cycle that never ends.
The good and hopeful thing is that Foucault wrote too that "resistance is always possible". It is possible to live against this control, this slavery. But I agree that it is difficult to stand firm on this resistance. But it is highly possible. The book progresses on later to a different economy - an upside down economy. "... a divine economy of desire - one that redeems desire from the postmodern capitalist economy that would distort desire in ways that hinder humanity's communion with God, one another, and the rest of creation." Which I will share about later (when I get to that part of the book =P )...
Thanks to the ongoing 10 Monday prayer sessions based on this book facilitated by Fr. Chris Soh, SJ @ Kingsmead Centre
It articulates most precisely what bothers me about the society in which we live in... and against which I too am struggling.
"... Deleuze and Foucault (Philosophers) develop an account for how we could be enslaved to the capitalist market in a way that we actually want or desire that captivity, all the while calling it and claiming ourselves to be 'free'... (C)apitalism is an economy of desire... (that) disciplines desire for market ends."
Like it or not, we have all, to different extents, been shaped in our desires by capitalism. Just notice the women who feel the need to own a branded bag, at times, even if it means to sacrifice more than half their monthly salary. And how those without one because they cannot afford it feels somewhat incomplete. Notice the black markets, the imitations that sell so well. Notice how men would change their cars to a more prestigious one when the opportunity arises, not necessarily because their current cars have reached its 10 year mark or to minimise financial loss. Notice the increase in number of slimming centres in Singapore in the last decade. How many people do not own a smartphone these days?
I need to colour my hair because black is dull and boring. The different colour streaks make me look fresher and younger. Whoever determined that black is dull and boring? And even if it is, why do I need to change the original colour? There must be no life on my face, no sparkle in my eyes, no smile to brighten up my face that I need to rely on my hair colour to add 'life' to my expression. I need to wear high-heels because it adds a touch of professionalism and makes me look nicer, more confident. And whoever fixed this? Isn't my toes, heels, back, knees and blood circulation more important?
We are taught that life equates having this and that, looking slim and good, etc. We are taught, precisely by the people who are marketing these products, saying we need all these. Why are they marketing it? Because they are really essentials in life? Because we really need it? Isn't it for their own profit sake?
We have misunderstood freedom to be the breaking free from that voice within that says, "Actually, I don't need these." We want to break free from this voice that tells us 'no need'. We don't want to be dictated to do this and that, to not do this and that. But in actual fact, instead of becoming free, we are becoming slaves and puppets, manipulated, disciplined by advertisements to become obedient monkeys to do the stunts that would gain the audience's applause, to buy the things that these advertisements tell us would make us happy, satisfied, more confident and truly living. We are being dictated without even realising it. We are being controlled so that we will hand over our money to some other people.
True freedom is the total opposite. True freedom is to be without need, that our happiness is not controlled by another party or worse still, by dead, non-living material things. True freedom is to be uncontrolled by external factors, that in any given circumstance, at any time, I am able to choose what gives me life in its true sense.
The sad truth in Singapore is that even education has become, not entirely but increasingly, tainted by capitalism. If I were really profit-driven, I would set up a tuition centre or similar. It will fetch me a much higher income than I would get as a full-time teacher or even a private one-to-one tutor. How many who sit in the upper management levels of schools are not more concerned about keeping their rice bowls intact than truly imparting the right values to students?
But above all, I find the saddest message that all these are sending is that I don't matter, that I am not more important than your money, that I am not more precious than these goods and appearances. It just disfigures the face of a human person, lowers one's dignity. And each time we succumb to being disciplined in our desires by capitalism, we are reaffirming ourselves that we are unimportant. Instead of growing into the image of Christ, we are becoming subconsciously convinced that we are worthless. And this brings about a whole range of consequent behaviours to try to prove our worth in all the wrong ways... in a vicious cycle that never ends.
The good and hopeful thing is that Foucault wrote too that "resistance is always possible". It is possible to live against this control, this slavery. But I agree that it is difficult to stand firm on this resistance. But it is highly possible. The book progresses on later to a different economy - an upside down economy. "... a divine economy of desire - one that redeems desire from the postmodern capitalist economy that would distort desire in ways that hinder humanity's communion with God, one another, and the rest of creation." Which I will share about later (when I get to that part of the book =P )...
Thanks to the ongoing 10 Monday prayer sessions based on this book facilitated by Fr. Chris Soh, SJ @ Kingsmead Centre
Sunday, 16 February 2014
Angel of Light - Journey to the West: Conquering the Demons
"Knowing stubbornness, one can let it go. Knowing what one wants, one can release it." ~ Movie: Journey to the West: Conquering the Demons
This is the power of awareness.
I can only change what I am aware of.
I can only know where to find true happiness when awareness differentiates what is life-giving and life-draining to me.
I can only empty myself of what I am aware is within me.
But awareness is not all.
Awareness is the first step to conquering the demons and perhaps, in our lives, the most dangerous demons aren't those that possess a person, causing him to foam in the mouth or be thrown about in convulsions. Rather, they are those hidden behind disguises, especially the disguise of holy dreams and good intentions. Those, as what St. Ignatius calls the angel of light, come in the form of good but they are actually leading us away from God. Deep awareness helps us to recognise the guise.
In the movie, a young monk denies human love between man and woman, denies his own attraction to a girl, because he saw this, which he called the "lesser love", as a distraction in his search for the "greater" love - Buddhahood. And because of this, he is always lacking a little something that prevents him from becoming a powerful demon-hunter despite his very compassionate heart. He goes around with a handbook of 300 nursery rhymes, given him by his master. He naively tries to convert demons he meets by trying to elicit the good out of them as he reads to them the rhymes. Needless to say, he always fails and finds many lives lost because he is unable to subdue the demons. He had no power in him. Finally, it was only when he held in his arms the woman he loved as she was dying that he admitted to his true feelings for her. That was his moment of transformation.
Experiencing that deep pain, the monk had a moment of enlightenment. He realised that human love IS a part of the greater love, and that love is not greater or lesser. Love is love in its fullest and any "love" that is measured is not love at all. Only when he realised this truth could he mature in his perception of life. He understood that he is not the one who can deliver the people from the demons, which then began his journey to the West to obtain the 22 scriptures from India. Only in not avoiding out of fear of not achieving something apparently holy was he able to grow and be filled in his lacking. His book of 300 nursery rhymes was then transformed into the Buddha sutra, and he was transfigured from a plain and shabby looking monk into a Buddha-like figure shining out with a radiant aura. From a powerless monk to the monk, Tripitaka, who set out on the long journey with the 3 previously evil spirits, who became his disciples.
The very method and approach this monk had in striving for Buddhahood (the disguise) became the very hindrance in his attaining it (led him away from the final goal instead). And it took him a great deal of pain and trials to bring him to the awareness of this. He then realised that it is only in knowing (awareness) that opens the door to choosing consciously. That the way to Buddhahood is not to escape from being human with its myriad of life experiences but it is the way of embracing, of accepting and then constantly choosing to purify oneself from all that one realises does not benefit oneself towards the ultimate life goal.
"Knowing stubbornness, one can let it go. Knowing what one wants, one can release it."
In our time, what are the disguises around us? Taking up a better-paying job to better provide financially for the family but significantly reducing the time and energy one has left to spend quality time with the family. Moving into a prestigious development only to forget the face of poverty and suffering, and becoming increasingly out of touch with the realities and essence of life and love. Pressurising children to perfect their examination scores but driving them to resentment and joylessness in the process. There are many.
Coming to the awareness of the many disguises in our lives does not necessarily mean we will then make the right choices in life. We need to know where these events, beliefs and actions are taking us - towards or away from God - and then to make the deliberate choice to follow the right voice and to NOT follow the wrong voice.
Where is the angel of light hiding in your life?
This is the power of awareness.
I can only change what I am aware of.
I can only know where to find true happiness when awareness differentiates what is life-giving and life-draining to me.
I can only empty myself of what I am aware is within me.
But awareness is not all.
Awareness is the first step to conquering the demons and perhaps, in our lives, the most dangerous demons aren't those that possess a person, causing him to foam in the mouth or be thrown about in convulsions. Rather, they are those hidden behind disguises, especially the disguise of holy dreams and good intentions. Those, as what St. Ignatius calls the angel of light, come in the form of good but they are actually leading us away from God. Deep awareness helps us to recognise the guise.
In the movie, a young monk denies human love between man and woman, denies his own attraction to a girl, because he saw this, which he called the "lesser love", as a distraction in his search for the "greater" love - Buddhahood. And because of this, he is always lacking a little something that prevents him from becoming a powerful demon-hunter despite his very compassionate heart. He goes around with a handbook of 300 nursery rhymes, given him by his master. He naively tries to convert demons he meets by trying to elicit the good out of them as he reads to them the rhymes. Needless to say, he always fails and finds many lives lost because he is unable to subdue the demons. He had no power in him. Finally, it was only when he held in his arms the woman he loved as she was dying that he admitted to his true feelings for her. That was his moment of transformation.
Experiencing that deep pain, the monk had a moment of enlightenment. He realised that human love IS a part of the greater love, and that love is not greater or lesser. Love is love in its fullest and any "love" that is measured is not love at all. Only when he realised this truth could he mature in his perception of life. He understood that he is not the one who can deliver the people from the demons, which then began his journey to the West to obtain the 22 scriptures from India. Only in not avoiding out of fear of not achieving something apparently holy was he able to grow and be filled in his lacking. His book of 300 nursery rhymes was then transformed into the Buddha sutra, and he was transfigured from a plain and shabby looking monk into a Buddha-like figure shining out with a radiant aura. From a powerless monk to the monk, Tripitaka, who set out on the long journey with the 3 previously evil spirits, who became his disciples.
The very method and approach this monk had in striving for Buddhahood (the disguise) became the very hindrance in his attaining it (led him away from the final goal instead). And it took him a great deal of pain and trials to bring him to the awareness of this. He then realised that it is only in knowing (awareness) that opens the door to choosing consciously. That the way to Buddhahood is not to escape from being human with its myriad of life experiences but it is the way of embracing, of accepting and then constantly choosing to purify oneself from all that one realises does not benefit oneself towards the ultimate life goal.
"Knowing stubbornness, one can let it go. Knowing what one wants, one can release it."
In our time, what are the disguises around us? Taking up a better-paying job to better provide financially for the family but significantly reducing the time and energy one has left to spend quality time with the family. Moving into a prestigious development only to forget the face of poverty and suffering, and becoming increasingly out of touch with the realities and essence of life and love. Pressurising children to perfect their examination scores but driving them to resentment and joylessness in the process. There are many.
Coming to the awareness of the many disguises in our lives does not necessarily mean we will then make the right choices in life. We need to know where these events, beliefs and actions are taking us - towards or away from God - and then to make the deliberate choice to follow the right voice and to NOT follow the wrong voice.
Where is the angel of light hiding in your life?
Saturday, 15 February 2014
God Lends A Hand
There was a little boy of 9 years old, named Peter, who wanted to learn to rollerblade. He had seen his neighbours having so much fun in the park rollerblading and he wanted to join them. He went up to his dad one morning and asked him to buy him a pair of rollerblades but his dad, wanting Peter to learn responsibility, gave him an empty piggy bank instead. He told his son, "Peter, you can join the kids at the park and I will even teach you to rollerblade. But I want you to learn to save up for the things you want to buy. I don't want to spoil you by giving you everything you want. From today, you will start putting in 50 cents from your pocket money into this piggy bank everyday. When you have saved up enough money, we will go to the store to buy the blades that you want."
Peter went away with mixed feelings. He was happy that his dad had allowed him to buy the rollerblades and would even teach him to rollerblade. However, as he flipped his calendar and counted the number of days it would take him to save up $120, he felt discouraged that it would take him about 8 months with 50 cents each day. It was far too long a wait and his dream seemed too distant. But he began saving anyway.
After school everyday, Peter eagerly dropped his 50 cents into his piggy bank, and he delighted in seeing it fill up more and more. On some days, when he had more pocket money left, he would drop in the extras. But what Peter did not know was that his dad had secretly added 50 cents each day to his piggy bank too. His dad knew that Peter would take a long time to save up for the pair of rollerblades and seeing how committed and responsible his son was, he wanted to lend a hand to make his dream come true earlier.
Four months later, Peter's dad asked Peter to bring his piggy bank to the table. They emptied it out and counted the coins. Peter's face lit up when they totalled up the money to $134! He could not believe it because he was expecting to take 8 months to arrive at that amount, not 4. Then, Peter's dad confessed that he had topped up another 50 cents each day. Peter was overjoyed. And off they went to the skate shop.
Last month, in my silent retreat, I was contemplating on the holy family's flee to Egypt to escape from Herod who wanted to kill baby Jesus. The most striking realisation was how God did not leave Joseph to fend for his family with his own strength and capabilities. God sent His angel to warn Joseph of the impending danger and directed him to bring his family to safety. If He had not, Joseph would not have known early enough of Herod's plans, given that he had no strings to pull nor money to bribe. The only way that Joseph could fulfil his life mission as Jesus's foster father and the protector of the holy family was in the heavenly Father's divine providence.
God Himself gives us what we need in order for us to fulfil the mission we have said 'yes' to. God is like and far more than Peter's dad who works behind the scenes, most of the time beyond our knowledge, to help us along the way. He knows fully well how lacking we are and the only result we are capable of is failure. And out of His great love for us, especially when we are carrying out the will He has called us to, He Himself aids us in the completion of that will. He never leaves us on our own. He never puts a task on our shoulders so that He can go on a vacation only to return thereafter to demand our good result. Such is the faithful and loving God we see across the old to the new testament.
Might there be something you are struggling with right now? Something that you are trying to do out of your love for God but finding that failure is the only constant result?
How might God be, through the stories of Peter and Joseph, inviting you to a deeper trust in His loving providence?
How is God also sending you His angel to give you directions?
Lk 22:43
Then an angel appeared to him (Jesus), coming from heaven to give him strength.
Ro 8:28
We know that by turning everything to their good God cooperates with all those who love him, with all those that he has called according to his purpose.
Peter went away with mixed feelings. He was happy that his dad had allowed him to buy the rollerblades and would even teach him to rollerblade. However, as he flipped his calendar and counted the number of days it would take him to save up $120, he felt discouraged that it would take him about 8 months with 50 cents each day. It was far too long a wait and his dream seemed too distant. But he began saving anyway.
After school everyday, Peter eagerly dropped his 50 cents into his piggy bank, and he delighted in seeing it fill up more and more. On some days, when he had more pocket money left, he would drop in the extras. But what Peter did not know was that his dad had secretly added 50 cents each day to his piggy bank too. His dad knew that Peter would take a long time to save up for the pair of rollerblades and seeing how committed and responsible his son was, he wanted to lend a hand to make his dream come true earlier.
Four months later, Peter's dad asked Peter to bring his piggy bank to the table. They emptied it out and counted the coins. Peter's face lit up when they totalled up the money to $134! He could not believe it because he was expecting to take 8 months to arrive at that amount, not 4. Then, Peter's dad confessed that he had topped up another 50 cents each day. Peter was overjoyed. And off they went to the skate shop.
Last month, in my silent retreat, I was contemplating on the holy family's flee to Egypt to escape from Herod who wanted to kill baby Jesus. The most striking realisation was how God did not leave Joseph to fend for his family with his own strength and capabilities. God sent His angel to warn Joseph of the impending danger and directed him to bring his family to safety. If He had not, Joseph would not have known early enough of Herod's plans, given that he had no strings to pull nor money to bribe. The only way that Joseph could fulfil his life mission as Jesus's foster father and the protector of the holy family was in the heavenly Father's divine providence.
God Himself gives us what we need in order for us to fulfil the mission we have said 'yes' to. God is like and far more than Peter's dad who works behind the scenes, most of the time beyond our knowledge, to help us along the way. He knows fully well how lacking we are and the only result we are capable of is failure. And out of His great love for us, especially when we are carrying out the will He has called us to, He Himself aids us in the completion of that will. He never leaves us on our own. He never puts a task on our shoulders so that He can go on a vacation only to return thereafter to demand our good result. Such is the faithful and loving God we see across the old to the new testament.
Might there be something you are struggling with right now? Something that you are trying to do out of your love for God but finding that failure is the only constant result?
How might God be, through the stories of Peter and Joseph, inviting you to a deeper trust in His loving providence?
How is God also sending you His angel to give you directions?
Lk 22:43
Then an angel appeared to him (Jesus), coming from heaven to give him strength.
Ro 8:28
We know that by turning everything to their good God cooperates with all those who love him, with all those that he has called according to his purpose.
Wednesday, 29 January 2014
Praying the Lunar New Year
We celebrate many festivities every year. Christmas, easter, new year, lunar new year, birthdays, wedding anniversaries, death anniversaries, feast days of saints. And the most common way of celebrating festivities for us Singaporeans, if we do celebrate them, is to gather together over a meal. New parents are most eager to throw a party for their child's 1st birthday. But it seems like as the years go by, the enthusiasm fades away gradually too. And I often hear the older folks commenting that there is no need to celebrate their birthdays because it is just another day. All of which makes me ponder a little more deeply why do we celebrate anniversaries, festivities?
For many years, my birthdays were about me. It's my special day of the year, when I become the center of attention, receiving gifts and well wishes. It's the day when everyone is particularly nice to me because it should be a day of happiness, not sadness. In recent years, if I'm not overseas, I will do the usual - go for Mass - and give thanks to God for my parents who brought me into the world and took care of me until now. My focus has been shifting away from myself and onto my parents. A day to remember and be grateful for God's blessings of my parents.
Yet what is even deeper and which I have not arrived at is a recollection of my life history, to see more intently how God has been there at every phase of my life. At every downfall and rising, in every moment of joy and sadness. To see the hand of God in the good and bad of my life so that I may come to a deeper interior knowledge of who He has been, who He is, and who He will continue to be for me. The focus of my birthday is rightly on God, from whom all my blessings, even the gift of my parents and family members, come.
Truly, we celebrate festivities to remember a significant event or person in our lives. This remembering is not simply to call to mind a matter of fact. Neither is it an emotional exercise to nostalgically reminisce an experience of an event or a person. Rather, we remember for the purpose of allowing these experiences to shape us in a way that brings us closer to the Giver of life and goodness - God. We remember so that we can recognise how God, through both the ups and downs of life, is making space in our hearts to welcome Him more fully. We remember so that we can recognise the God in our experiences; who He has been, who He is and who He will continue to be. Celebrations are occasions of remembering. A remembering of God.
Remembering then takes on a whole new meaning, a whole new direction. It moves us deeper in love with God because the more we recognise God in our lives, the more we come to know Him intimately. We encounter Love itself, who then draws us into a deeper relationship with Him. Our celebrations, when they direct our attention to the God in all things, will no longer be a superficially happy occasion that lasts for a few hours but a deep joyful encounter of love that contributes to our eternal life.
Mark 14:1-2 reads
It was two days before the Passover and the feast of Unleavened Bread, and the chief priests and the scribes were looking for a way to arrest Jesus by some trick and have him put to death. For they said, 'It must not be during the festivities, or there will be a disturbance among the people'.
http://bible-truth.org/Feasts-UnleavenBread.html
The Feast of the Unleaven Bread begins the next night after the Passover and celebrates Israel being delivered from bondage in Egypt. Lev. 23:6
A morning and evening sacrifice was offered. Only unleaven bread is eaten and meat of the sacrifices. Exodus 12:19 states the seriousness of the commandment from God. “Seven days shall there be no leaven found in your houses: for whosoever eateth that which is leavened, even that soul shall be cut off from the congregation of Israel, whether he be a stranger, or born in the land.” Leaven is symbolic of sin and the Passover was a memorial to God’s delivering them from slavery in Egypt, but also a time of repentance and the putting away of sin. Galatians 5:9 says, “A little leaven leaveneth the whole lump.” Leaven when placed in a lump of flour will begin to grow and spread until it permeates the whole lump. The picture is that of one diligently searching for and getting rid of sin even the smallest sin in one’s life. Even as a little leaven (sin) will spoil the whole of the lump, therefore any and all sin is to be confessed and put out of one’s life.
Leaven is yeast, which is added to flour for baking. This yeast refers to sin added to our lives.
At a time when the Jews were supposed to be preparing for the Passover and the feast of Unleavened Bread, what occupied the hearts and minds of the chief priests and scribes was not the remembrance of God's faithful love and goodness in bringing them out of their slavery in Egypt, not the remembrance of how God wills of them to be His faithful people. They had forgotten the goodness of God and thus, were unable to show charity, mercy, compassion towards Jesus. They were jealous, threatened by Jesus' authority and popularity. They had no space in their hearts to humbly acknowledge this Son of God who makes their evil, secret thoughts known publicly. The kindness God had shown to their ancestors, they had not interiorized in their hearts. And so, they could not recognize who Jesus is, that He has come from God, a truth that even the evil spirits that Jesus cast out of the possessed people knew and acknowledged (Mark 1:24 - 'What do you want with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are: the Holy One of God.').
The commandments handed to them by Moses (Exodus 20:13,16) 'You shall not kill', 'You shall not bear false witness against your neighbour', (Exodus 34:14) 'You shall bow down to no other god'. The chief priests and scribes broke. They were scheming to kill Jesus, they were making themselves gods. They who always pride themselves as the holy ones who kept every law, making themselves perfect before God. If only they had not celebrated the festivities for the sake of keeping the laws for their own self-love and self-preservation sake. If only they had allowed their celebrations to point their hearts and minds more and more towards God, who truly is the point of the festivities. And if only we too allow our own celebrations to point us towards God.
Tomorrow, we celebrate Chinese New Year Eve, when we traditionally reunite with our families to deepen relationships. But more than this, and not so traditionally, it is a time to recollect the past year and give thanks, to recognise the hand of God in the past year, identify how God is calling us to imitate Him in those areas we fall short, and praying for the graces we need to rely on Him for in the new year to become better disciples.
As we celebrate tomorrow and in the days to come, how can you pray your lunar new year?
For many years, my birthdays were about me. It's my special day of the year, when I become the center of attention, receiving gifts and well wishes. It's the day when everyone is particularly nice to me because it should be a day of happiness, not sadness. In recent years, if I'm not overseas, I will do the usual - go for Mass - and give thanks to God for my parents who brought me into the world and took care of me until now. My focus has been shifting away from myself and onto my parents. A day to remember and be grateful for God's blessings of my parents.
Yet what is even deeper and which I have not arrived at is a recollection of my life history, to see more intently how God has been there at every phase of my life. At every downfall and rising, in every moment of joy and sadness. To see the hand of God in the good and bad of my life so that I may come to a deeper interior knowledge of who He has been, who He is, and who He will continue to be for me. The focus of my birthday is rightly on God, from whom all my blessings, even the gift of my parents and family members, come.
Truly, we celebrate festivities to remember a significant event or person in our lives. This remembering is not simply to call to mind a matter of fact. Neither is it an emotional exercise to nostalgically reminisce an experience of an event or a person. Rather, we remember for the purpose of allowing these experiences to shape us in a way that brings us closer to the Giver of life and goodness - God. We remember so that we can recognise how God, through both the ups and downs of life, is making space in our hearts to welcome Him more fully. We remember so that we can recognise the God in our experiences; who He has been, who He is and who He will continue to be. Celebrations are occasions of remembering. A remembering of God.
Remembering then takes on a whole new meaning, a whole new direction. It moves us deeper in love with God because the more we recognise God in our lives, the more we come to know Him intimately. We encounter Love itself, who then draws us into a deeper relationship with Him. Our celebrations, when they direct our attention to the God in all things, will no longer be a superficially happy occasion that lasts for a few hours but a deep joyful encounter of love that contributes to our eternal life.
Mark 14:1-2 reads
It was two days before the Passover and the feast of Unleavened Bread, and the chief priests and the scribes were looking for a way to arrest Jesus by some trick and have him put to death. For they said, 'It must not be during the festivities, or there will be a disturbance among the people'.
http://bible-truth.org/Feasts-UnleavenBread.html
The Feast of the Unleaven Bread begins the next night after the Passover and celebrates Israel being delivered from bondage in Egypt. Lev. 23:6
A morning and evening sacrifice was offered. Only unleaven bread is eaten and meat of the sacrifices. Exodus 12:19 states the seriousness of the commandment from God. “Seven days shall there be no leaven found in your houses: for whosoever eateth that which is leavened, even that soul shall be cut off from the congregation of Israel, whether he be a stranger, or born in the land.” Leaven is symbolic of sin and the Passover was a memorial to God’s delivering them from slavery in Egypt, but also a time of repentance and the putting away of sin. Galatians 5:9 says, “A little leaven leaveneth the whole lump.” Leaven when placed in a lump of flour will begin to grow and spread until it permeates the whole lump. The picture is that of one diligently searching for and getting rid of sin even the smallest sin in one’s life. Even as a little leaven (sin) will spoil the whole of the lump, therefore any and all sin is to be confessed and put out of one’s life.
Leaven is yeast, which is added to flour for baking. This yeast refers to sin added to our lives.
At a time when the Jews were supposed to be preparing for the Passover and the feast of Unleavened Bread, what occupied the hearts and minds of the chief priests and scribes was not the remembrance of God's faithful love and goodness in bringing them out of their slavery in Egypt, not the remembrance of how God wills of them to be His faithful people. They had forgotten the goodness of God and thus, were unable to show charity, mercy, compassion towards Jesus. They were jealous, threatened by Jesus' authority and popularity. They had no space in their hearts to humbly acknowledge this Son of God who makes their evil, secret thoughts known publicly. The kindness God had shown to their ancestors, they had not interiorized in their hearts. And so, they could not recognize who Jesus is, that He has come from God, a truth that even the evil spirits that Jesus cast out of the possessed people knew and acknowledged (Mark 1:24 - 'What do you want with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are: the Holy One of God.').
The commandments handed to them by Moses (Exodus 20:13,16) 'You shall not kill', 'You shall not bear false witness against your neighbour', (Exodus 34:14) 'You shall bow down to no other god'. The chief priests and scribes broke. They were scheming to kill Jesus, they were making themselves gods. They who always pride themselves as the holy ones who kept every law, making themselves perfect before God. If only they had not celebrated the festivities for the sake of keeping the laws for their own self-love and self-preservation sake. If only they had allowed their celebrations to point their hearts and minds more and more towards God, who truly is the point of the festivities. And if only we too allow our own celebrations to point us towards God.
Tomorrow, we celebrate Chinese New Year Eve, when we traditionally reunite with our families to deepen relationships. But more than this, and not so traditionally, it is a time to recollect the past year and give thanks, to recognise the hand of God in the past year, identify how God is calling us to imitate Him in those areas we fall short, and praying for the graces we need to rely on Him for in the new year to become better disciples.
As we celebrate tomorrow and in the days to come, how can you pray your lunar new year?
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