After school this afternoon, Keith lifted his leg above the parapet of the school building and pulled his body over. His friends pulled him down and proclaimed at the top of their voices that Keith wanted to commit suicide. They were still speaking about it among one another 2 hours later. They knew he was serious about it but little did they know that Keith was not out of his mind when he wanted to throw himself off the building. All throughout CCA, Keith was barely present. When it was time to sit down, his body was curled up in a ball as he hugged his knees as closely to his chest as he could.
The teacher called out to Keith, whose eyes were red and as he spoke, tears fell uncontrollably. He explained that life is miserable, too miserable for him to take, and so, he wanted to end it. An accumulation of frustrations, of pain and hurts, of disappointments and rejection, with nowhere to go for help, no one to turn to.
Keith is turning 12 this year, with barely sufficient coping mechanisms to get him through the harsh reality of life. A child being surrounded by the artificial image of a rosy life for nine years and placed on a pedestal, only to be beaten down thereafter by the same people who now picks on his weaknesses instead of responsibly teaching him, as parents, how to overcome his flaws and cope with his shortcomings.
Keith affirmed that he knows fully well that his parents are scolding him excessively out of love for him. "Love", such a pure and beautiful gift. How does it then become a weapon to corner a person, disarming him of even the slightest hope of a happy life? How can something so divine bring about destruction and pain? Look around us (and we don't have to look very far). How many are troubled by problems of one kind or another? How many of these problems have aroused because of our imperfect love? Have we really understood what love is? We probably believe we do. We are knowledgeable people of the 21st century, with information readily at our fingertips. We turn on the media and we are taught what "love" looks like. Understanding concepts is nothing new or challenging for most of us. And we chuck religion aside or at least to the bottom half of our priority list, not realising that it is precisely because of all the inaccurate teachings about "love" that bombard us throughout each day that we need a good example and definition of love that we can fall back on for the truth. A definition that has been tried and tested and proven repeatedly to hold true across time and space.
People need the Lord - the Perfect Sacrifice of Love. But people do not want to admit so. And there are also those who do not even realise they are empty inside, just as the song tells us. They seem to be aborting themselves, with the silent cry in their hearts for the Truth being left unattended. People are suffering as a result. Innumerable people are suffering the brokenness of their lives, without any idea how to go about mending the increasing number and deepening cracks in their hearts. And so they lay layers after layers of cement to cover up the cracks.
Keith's parents are probably exasperated in the face of their less-than-perfect son, knowing that the world tolerates no shortcomings. Being confronted by the reality of societal demands and the reality of the imperfections of their son, what do they do next? How should they act? We can find our answers in Christ, who has taught us explicitly what love is. All Keith needed for a start is practical ideas of how to work around his major flaws. His eyes lit up when he was given those ideas because he felt that he was not a hopeless case any more. It will take him far more than practical ideas to mend his wounds but in time, with the help of God's graces, he will learn and grow.
Surely, we are imperfect and so is the love we are capable of extending. But in our imperfections lies the loophole in us, through which Christ can shine His Light and make Himself known to others. If we keep up our efforts and commitment to imitate Him more closely each day, even if it takes decades, we will still become more radiant reflections of Him.
Do you take Jesus as your answer key to life's many questions?
To those who are in pain, how can you share Jesus with them?
9 Jan 2012, Monday
10.20pm
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